just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
Randomize
