He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
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