She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Randomize
