But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I looked at my own cervix.
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
