I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
