My nipple is on Facebook.
A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
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