Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
this boner is exhausting
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Randomize
