Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
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