i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
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