okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
