uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Randomize