What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize
