I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
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