Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
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