So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
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