We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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