yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
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