Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
Is it because I queefed?
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
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