I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
Randomize