did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
