Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
We are two peas in an std pod
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
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