its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
Randomize
