She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
Randomize
