dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Tornado booty call.. dedication
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
