giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
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