I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize
