so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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