I puked a lego.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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