Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize