is your mom at the bar?
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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