I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
