Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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