They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
