STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
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