when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
Randomize
