I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
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