Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize