Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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