just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Randomize
