it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
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