Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
