I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
Randomize
