I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
