We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize