can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
