More tranny stories later!
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize
