I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Randomize
