...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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