And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
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