So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
