I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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